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From Flirting To Forever, How To Get a Man To Fall In Love With You

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15 Ruthless Dictators Looking for Love on OK Cupid

Being a ruthless dictator is a difficult job. Genocide, oppression, racism and avoiding assassination make a man pretty lonely. Here are 15 dictators looking for love using OK Cupid ads. Ladies? Ladies….?

Ali Abdullah Saleh: Yemen

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What I’m doing with my life: Trying to keep myself from getting shot by my beloved people.
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I’ve been shot
I’m looking for: Someone who enjoys cooking Italian and oppressive rule
You should message me if: You own any predator drones. I love those things!

Jose Eduardo dos Santos: Angola

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What I’m doing with my life: Trying to find Angola on a map
The first thing people usually notice about me: That you get two Santos for the price of one
I’m looking for: Someone who doesn’t mind living in a third world Hellhole
You should message me if: You like long walks on the beach strewn with the bodies of my enemies.

Teodoro Obiang Nguema Mbasogo: Equatorial Guinea

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What I’m doing with my life: Trying to pronounce my name
The first thing people usually notice about me: That my name tag wraps around my chest
I’m looking for: A chick with a name like “Wu” or “Chi”. No more than three letters!
You should message me if: You like listening to Celine Dione.

Nursultan Abishuly Nazarbayev: Kazakhstan

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What I’m doing with my life: Trying to have Sasha Baron Cohen killed
The first thing people usually notice about me: That there are a thousand corpses on my front lawn
I’m looking for: Someone that isn’t squeamish
You should message me if: You’re turned on by crimes against humanity.

Alexander Grigoryevich Lukashenko: Belarus

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What I’m doing with my life: Trying to convince people that yes, that’s an actual name of a country
The first thing people usually notice about me: My gangsta tats.
I’m looking for: An old fashioned girl who thinks Hitler was misunderstood.
You should message me if: You’re a fan of Schindler’s List, except for the third act.

Frank Bainimarama: Fiji

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What I’m doing with my life: Living on a tiny island with one palm tree.
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I was not in the band Bananarama.
I’m looking for: Two people to help me reenact the opening of Hawaii 5-O. You know, with the rowers at the beginning. That would be cool.
You should message me if: You realize I can’t get you any free bottled water.

Saparmurat Niyazov: Turkmenistan

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What I’m doing with my life: Banishing dogs from the capital because of their unappealing odor!
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I am strangling their dog
I’m looking for: Someone who understands they must be controlled by the state
You should message me if: You want a boyfriend-for-life!

Hamid Karzai: Afghanistan

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What I’m doing with my life: Collecting bribes and answering calls from crybaby warlords.
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I am covered in poppy seeds.
I’m looking for: Bribes and dates. Preferably both.
You should message me if: Your bills are unmarked and you control at least four square miles of poppy fields.

Islom Karimov: Uzbekistan

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What I’m doing with my life: Boiling political opponents in oil.
The first thing people usually notice about me: I wear a chef’s hat everywhere!
I’m looking for: The proper seasoning for a Belgian.
You should message me if: You like your fondue screaming.

Abdullah of Saudi Arabia: Saudi Arabia

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What I’m doing with my life: Protecting the culture of my people by brutally oppressing them.
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I’m wearing my sheets.
I’m looking for: Wife #142
You should message me if: You don’t mind group showers

Raul Castro: Cuba

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What I’m doing with my life: Waiting for my brother to die.
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I’m not my brother and my face isn’t a T-shirt.
I’m looking for: Someone that will help me row to Miami.
You should message me if: You’d like some free cigars.

Robert Mugabe: Zimbabwe

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What I’m doing with my life: Trying to save up ten trillion Zimbabwe dollars for a loaf of bread.
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I’m accompanied by a witch doctor wherever I go.
I’m looking for: A woman who will love me for who I am, a brutal dictator and a lover of fine wines.
You should message me if: You want to hook up with a racists homophobe.

Muammar Gaddafi: Libya

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What I’m doing with my life: As much as I can in the short time I have left.
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I’m hiding behind a bunker and a battalion of bodyguards.
I’m looking for: A woman that is a tiger in the sack and can take a few bullets if she has to act as a human shield.
You should message me if: You’re not trying to figure out my coordinates for a missile.

Kim Jong-il: North Korea

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What I’m doing with my life: Making taller dictators look less crazy.
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I’m only slightly less taller than the puppet that played me in Team America.
I’m looking for: Stuff to look at.
You should message me if: You are under four feet and don’t mind calling me “Great Leader” in the sack.

Hosni Mubarak: Egypt

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What I’m doing with my life: I’m retired… for now.
The first thing people usually notice about me: That I’m being chased by Egyptian peace activists.
I’m looking for: Someone that longs for oppressive rule and an iron fist.
You should message me if: You like the Pyramids. I can get us tickets. Front row.


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Mesmerize Him…And Make Him Love You Forever

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77 Percent of Small Business Owners Love What They Do: Do You?

I remember the first “Sex and the City” movie (sorry, guys—it won’t take long) where Jennifer Hudson, who played Carrie Bradshaw’s assistant, said, “Love is the thing you know.” It stuck with me. When it comes to business, I would add that joy is too.

We spend too many hours a day on the job—whether for someone else or for ourselves—to hate it. (Don’t we?) We need to take joy in what we do if we intend to make it for the long term.

How do you feel about doing your own thing? Some 77 percent of small business owners in the Small Business Happiness Index by Vista Prints are either “very” or “extremely” happy about running a business and working for themselves. (The survey focused on 900 U.S. microbusinesses with one to 10 employees and less than $100,000 in annual revenues–primarily home-based businesses.)

Are you still in love with your business or is the feeling fading? And if it is, what can you do about it?

love job

Just because you love it doesn’t mean it’s not hard work.

Almost half (47 percent) of those surveyed for this index indicated that they are working more hours this year than they did in 2010.  Many of us understand the difference between the job and the business. It is easy to double your workload when you start a small business, both out of necessity and passion. When you have a need, a vision and a love for the business, it is easy to slip into long hours.  And if your heart is really in it, it won’t even seem like work.

But it is work. And there has to be some kind of downtime (lesson learned the hard way). The cool thing about having your own business is that choice to balance is yours.

Just because you love it is no excuse to be sloppy with it.

You know the (scary) business model that has the kind of organization that only you can understand?  You may understand it, but it is still a bit of mess, especially if you are talking about future teamwork.   We still need systems and structure that allows people to help us. Because the day will come when you take that long overdue vacation, and you want the business to improve while you are gone, instead of falling apart.

Just because you love it doesn’t mean your children will too.

It’s the documented systems and structure that make it possible to sell your business one day (should you choose).  That same structure makes it easier to pass it on—should you choose a legacy instead of a sale. Why leave a mess, when you could leave a mission and a system that your children could carry on (or sell) without giving up their own dreams?

Are you happy with your business?

From Small Business Trends

77 Percent of Small Business Owners Love What They Do: Do You?

View full post on Small Business News, Tips, Advice – Small Business Trends